“I tell you what, them Irish genes are good. They’ve served me well. We are made tough. We are made of steel. So I have no doubt the blood in my genes, the Irish blood in me has definitely stood to me. My family’s lineage, we are warriors.” – Óglach Conor McGregor
“If things are to alter during the next fifty years then we must re-embrace Byron’s ideal: the cultured thug.” – Some Anglo sperg
The Forging of a Gaelic Warrior
In this article I will look at why Conor McGregor is THE Cultured Thug. Firstly, a bit of background to the Notorious (not that he needs an introduction, but I need the filler for this article… wait, what?) McGregor was born on 14 July 1988 (editor’s note: 👀). He was born in Crumlin but really he’s from Lucan (“niggas be saying they from Crumlin, when they really from Lucan”). He attended Irish language schools in both primary and secondary. He was an active youngfella in his youth, playing football for Lourdes Celtic and boxing at Crumlin Boxing Club. He joined boxing to defend himself against bullies (on a side note, this is why I’m pro-bullying as a lot of the time it inspires the bullied to make something of themselves.) I was a bully in school and I often think of the amount of lads I must have inspired to do something great with their lives. Anyway, my pro-bullying argument is for another time, back to McGregor’s early life. In 2006, the McGregor clan moved to Lucan. (I take back what I said earlier, maybe he really is from Crumlin… I’m a bad researcher.) After finishing school, he did what any true Cultured Thug in the making would do and went into a trade, specifically plumbing.
He started MMA after meeting fellow future UFC fighter Tom Egan and after training MMA for a while, he quit plumbing in order to put all his effort into becoming a professional MMA fighter (dole kings stay winning). He made his amateur MMA debut in February 2007 when he was only 18. He won by TKO in the first round. After this fight, he turned pro and a year later started training with Coach Kavanagh at SBG. In 2008, he made his professional MMA debut and after an impressive record, signed with the UFC in 2013 when Dana White came to Trinity College to accept an award and was bombarded with requests to sign him.
A Deano Worthy of Respect
Of course, every Cultured Thug must know how to defend himself and we all know McGregor certainly can. He still holds the UFC record for fastest knockout in a title match when he knocked out Jose Aldo after only 13 seconds to win the Featherweight Championship. His first loss in the UFC came against Nate Diaz but McGrgegor showed he can bounce back from defeat when he beat Diaz in the rematch. After this, McGregor went on to fight Eddie Alvarez for the Lightweight belt. He won after a dominating performance and became the first fighter to hold UFC belts from two different weight classes.
When it comes to creativity, something a Cultured Thug should have, McGregor has it in both fighting and oratory skills. His fighting style when he first started in the UFC was unique and he stood with a karate stance, something not seen too often in the UFC. His style has somewhat changed since then but in one of his more recent fights against Donald Cerrone, he hits him in the face with his shoulder a couple of times, bursting Cerrone’s nose open, something I hadn’t seen before. His trash talk is next to none and there is only one UFC fighter that comes close, that being Chael Sonnen. Who can forget at the McGregor vs Alvarez press conference when a member of the audience asked McGregor “Who do you think would give you the hardest fight out of anyone on stage?” As McGregor paused for a second and looked around, Jeremy Stephens, a fellow UFC fighter, said he’d be his toughest opponent. McGregor looked around as if he genuinely had no clue who said that and said “who the fuck is that guy?” /LiterallyWho/ing a professional fighter can only be described as a moment of rarefied kino. Or when he showed up to the McGregor vs Aldo press conference in Rio De Janeiro and said “I own this town. I am the owner of Rio de Janeiro. I’m sitting up here with my feet on the desk. What’s anyone up there gonna do about it? Not one of yous are gonna do anything about it. The name of McGregor, my family motto ‘S Rioghal Mo Dhream’, means royalty is in my blood and that goes way back. So for him to say he is the King and I am the joker, if this was a different time, I would invade his favela on horseback and kill anyone who was not fit to work. But we are in a new time, so I will whoop his ass in July.” A joker moment indeed.
And even with a broken leg, he was still trash talking when he said to Dustin Porier “your wife is in me DM’s baby”. Not only is he a gifted trash talker but he also has some philosophical quotes such as “Precision beats power, timing beats speed”, “There’s no talent here, this is hard work. This is an obsession. Talent doesn’t exist, we all are equals as human beings. You could be anyone if you put in the time. You will reach the top, and that’s that. I’m not talented, I am obsessed.” and “I am cocky in prediction. I am confident in preparation, but I am always humble in victory or defeat.”
As I mentioned earlier, McGregor attended a Gaelscoil for both primary and secondary school. He said in an interview with balls.ie (uncultured reddit swine) that he is fluent but needs to brush up on it. During one of the press conferences with Khabib, Khabib questioned why he didn’t speak his native language to which McGregor replied “An bhfuil cead agam dul go dti an leithreas ar an mbus” referring to Khabib’s reaction to McGregor throwing a dolly at the bus him and his team were on. At the same press conference, McGregor showed he knows his heritage “My family, my bloodline, the McGregor clan. We stood, we fought. We fought the English empire, so much so that our name was banished for 100 years by King James.”
McGregor is a clever businessman and has successfully launched a pub in Dublin along with his own stout and whiskey. He didn’t forget his roots and named the whiskey Proper 12 with Crumlin being located in Dublin 12 and the word proper being a popular word amongst the youngfellawaffen, proper order. He also has endorsement deals with some of the world’s biggest companies such as Beats by Dre, Monster (the ultimate gentleman’s choice of nonalcoholic beverage), Reebok, Bud Light and Burger King.
Rumours on the streets of Dublin are that McGregor only wanted a deal with Burger King after a certain airplane incident, these rumours are yet to be confirmed however. Not only is McGregor something of an entrepreneur, he has recently taken up acting and even starred in his own advertisement for his new apple whiskey. It was a clever play on Steve Jobs and Apple with McGregor dressed as him. He finishes the ad by saying “How do you like them apples?” From this ad, a meme was born, “The Gael Stare” meme, seen below.
“The Gael Stare”, pixel on Twitter, 2023
Blood is Thicker Than Water
McGregor has shown tremendous loyalty towards his family and friends. He has looked after his family financially and was asked in a recent interview what his greatest achievement is and he simply replied “his kids”. His son was baptized in the Vatican and McGregor recently returned there and was pictured praying and holding the keys to the Vatican, continuing the long-established link between Gaelic warlords and Rome. Whatever to be said of his private life, he is a man of faith.
His feud with Khabib “Cuck for Russia, ‘Russia is Our Greatest Ally'” Nurmagomedowhatever started with Khabib hitting McGregor’s then-friend and sparring partner, Artem Lobov, a slap after cornering him with his gang in a hotel in New York. After hearing this, McGregor gathered his senior youngfellawaffen members and flew by private jet to New York. He and his battalion found Khabib and co. hiding on a bus. Like a scene from WWE, except it was actually real, McGregor threw a dolly at the bus, smashing the window. Khabib stayed on the bus with McGregor famously stating that he shit his pants. Who wouldn’t want a pal who has your back like that?
When you walk into the lounge area of the Black Forge (aka the Deano Inn), you will see a framed picture to your left which has become a symbol of the coming youngfella revolution, it is of course the mural of the lad on the horse in Smithfield. This gesture along with McGregor supporting the East Wall movement shows how tapped into modern Irish Nationalist culture he really is, and, more or less, shows he is ready to lead the coming youngfella revolution in Easter 2024. Can you imagine McGregor saying to a few thousand Deanos: “we’re not here to take part, we’re here to take over” and then marching on the [redacted].
P.S. Mr. McGregor, if you’re reading this, the term “Cultured Thug” is not an insult. I’m your top replyguy. Yours sincerely, Lanklet Dev.